My Photos of Vegas will Bore You

A lump of blah – view from my room, my cab driver and I laughing our guts out, a BigMac.

I had a great trip, it just doesn’t translate in the photos.

Don’t like this city – the level of excess, how people turn up their inner d-bag, the level of entitlement. The irony is the size of the blog tag Vegas (30)

It’s bad form to take photos at the conference (why.)

Actually, aside from that steak photo, the only pic of me all week is this selfie.

Like any good gambler, I’m only showing you my wins.

The Black Hat NOC – Network Operations Centre.

Spotted on the vendor floor.

The arrow is pointing at a blinking light, which is what made me stop, which is what the booth guy said makes everyone stop, which we laughed about because how ridiclous is it that – one little light!

Another vendor – give your email and get to smash computers.

The Rapid 7 party.

You’ve seen that name, I use them for my home entertainment system.

To conclude, here’s new headers.

Blog tag = headers

 

 

It’s Always a Nice Day at the Casino

That’s part of why I like it here.

Another part is that it’s much like an airport – everyone’s guards go down or off, which makes for excellent people watching.

I also think you can learn a lot about a person, based on how they conduct themselves in a casino.

Like that old saying… “if you want to know someone’s real nature, play golf or drink with them”… I’d add, “go together to a casino”.

Casinos are safe. With that many cameras and security, nothing bad can happen to you.

You can walk around openly with a fist full of money (I do), no one is going to try any electronic-scanning-wizardry in here.

I play slots with my gambling partner, we have a system. The arrow above is us crushing it, because a human had to come pay us out, “Hand Pay“.

If that ever happens to you, how that works is: put your palm out flat for the cameras > bills are counted into it > play one hand / spin in front of the attendant > done

Video poker though, that’s my game.

Best odds in the house guys.

See the purple circle first column?

The rule is: play a 9/6 machine, then an 8/5, don’t bother with anything lower.

I play ‘Jacks or Better’.

I have a theory:
video poker strategy, is the same strategy,
used to win at life.

You’ve gotta use an art of the long view, and stick to the system exactly or it doesn’t work, there will be more negative hands than positive ones, because that is the games nature, and you have to stay unaffected by this.

Can’t figure out how to film that though, since cameras aren’t so encouraged in casinos.

I recently had my biggest win ever, playing video poker.

$1,600 YA buddy.

Blog tag = Casino

 

 

Things from My Week in Vegas

Some outfits.

I always visit the jewellery stores, one of my only material weaknesses.

This line is a favourite.

Check out the lineup to see Batman 5 days after it opened BOOM. Had the theatre to myself. Review: I loved it.

It’s the only superhero story I like, because he is a normal human who turns himself into more.

I gamble on only two games: ‘Wheel of Fortune’ slots, and video poker.  Video Poker has maybe the best odds in the casino.

Look at the purple circle first column, the rule is: you want a 9/6 machine, then an 8/5, don’t bother with anything lower.

I’m good at the latter, but really, it’s just pattern recognition.

I have in my head a whole life-strategy-is-like-video-poker-strategy-there’s-many-parrells-video in my head to make, there really are.

One of my favourite nights was Thursday Night #NotSurprising (if we are just meeting, I say it every week because it is: Thursdasy Night is the best night of the week).

That’s right, silence! It’s ridiculously hard to find here.

This is the penthouse of a casino off the strip, where check THIS out :O

How is that even possible at a casino? Where are the insurance people?

Then, oh THEN there was a pool table. I love to play pool.

And I played some of the best pool of my whole life.

I couldn’t miss. Not even being dramatic, it was Hollywood movie shots I was making happen. After one particularly amazing combo I yelled, “you guys are getting this, right?!”.  I was the zone.

And that’s it, Vegas tada the end.

Never been a fan, but I seem to always end up here; that’s 14-ish times now.  Here’s a post from last year.

Vegas, to me, is: over-the-top-over-stimulating, this shiny delusion that brings out the entitled dbag side of people, and just, excess is gross.  But it’s the world’s conference centre.  See you again soon I’m sure.

 

 

Things From Vegas

A fast preface – I didn’t take many photos, I never do.

I don’t see the point of photographing things I know are online, and prettier, than I can take.

Here’s what I did document.

You can take beers for a walk on the streets here.

I stayed at the Paris.  It’s a sister property to the Rio (where DefCon was held), which means I had a shuttle available to me, to move back and forth.

The people were great there, and I’m not going to diss the place, but will tell you: you get what you pay for.

If possible, you want to stay at a Wynn property, to my eye they’re the only ones that have been maintained as a Vegas casino should be. This comes from years of eyes, this had to have been my tenth trip to Vegas.

I don’t even really like the place, I just seem to always end up there, much like how I end up at Jays games. I was at another Jays game just last week actually. That’ll be a fun post.

Here’s the front steps of Ceaser’s, a former Wynn hotel.

I read once that Steve Wynn is so exacting, he used to have the white parking line painted crisp white every    single    day.

Was this place ever cool, even opening day? Doubtful.

$10 says these branded slot machines were part of the movie marketing plan from day one.

For goodness sake do not get sucked into the giantism slot machine, worst odds of all.

Video poker has some of the best odds, maybe THE best.

I have in my head a video to make about video poker, while doubling down and testing the green screen studio I’m going to build.

I find many life lessons are parallel with video poker strategy.

If you ever would like to give me a gift of jewellery, this is my favourite.

I am easily satisfied by the very best.

Top left is sunlight in a casino, very rare, bottom left is the dinner I took myself to on the last night, to celebrate success.

I’ve said it before – it’s important to mark your successes and wins, to stamp them.

That was my cab driver after said dinner. When I got into the car he exclaimed, “I drove you to the Rio earlier!?!”.

We freaked out, what are the chances of that!  So we documented it with this photo and some awkward posing.

I’ll leave you with this, taken on my last day.

It’s not possible to be happier with life than I am here.

 

 

I Haven’t Yet Officially Wished You HNY

So HAPPY NEW YEAR to YOU!!

May it be your best one yet!!

I’m kinda jinxy and methodical about how I spend the hours before the a new year. This year I wanted to be around a bunch of money, so I went to a casino.

Played slots and video poker (my favourite game, and only play on at least a 9/6 machine kay). Turned $20 into $70 in 10 minutes of play. Mission accomplished.

And let the record show that Wheel of Fortune is THE best game period. I get so pumped when me or anyone in my row gets to spin.

Then I ripped up that note, which has been folded in my wallet for 7 months, and pitched it into the sky.

So sometimes I’m like, super dramatic, whatever.